I usually dismiss all conspiracy theories. I don’t believe in large groups of people getting together and controlling everything else, with nobody – except some blogger in his pyjamas – finding out about it. As someone who subscribes to the theory of methodological individualism, I generally have a hard time believing any explanation that pretends to explain a certain action without saying who the actor is or with what methods a goal is achieved. After trying to reason with conspiracy theorists, I discovered that humor is the only way to deal with them.
But now even I think that something fishy is going on. I don’t know who is behind it. I don’t even know why. But it’s obvious that something abnormal is going on; something dangerous. This can’t be coincidence:
On 17 June 2015, Jealean Talley died in Michigan. Only two months before, on 6 April 2015, she had become the oldest living person. On that day, Gertrude Weaver, who had been the oldest living person until then, died in Arkansas. She had only attained that title 5 days before, on 1 April 2015. By now, it won’t surprise you that it was another “accident” which gained her that dubious title: Misao Okawa, who had until then been the oldest living person, had died in Japan on that day.
Within only three months, three people became the oldest living person and all three of them died. This is shocking enough. But it gets worse: it turns out that in the past decades, whoever was the oldest living person would die within a few years, often only a few months, after attaining that title. Statistically, this is the most dangerous of all the world records. I went through the data, but none of the other world record holders, be it smallest person, largest person, heaviest person, fastest person and so on, faces the same certainty of death as the oldest living person.
There must be some conspiracy, but I haven’t got the slightest clue yet as to who could be behind it.
I hope she won’t read this, but if this pattern continues, I am fairly certain that Susannah Mushatt Jones will be the next oldest living person to get killed in this abhorrent streak of violence.